"Woman without Children"

We had to go to a Halloween party last weekend. I like Halloween, I really do. But the costume thing gets me every year. I always wait too long and then expect to just open my closet door and have cute, clever costume jump out at me.

It never happens. I usually end up going as a doctor because I have a set of scrubs and a jacket. Why you ask? Because once upon a time I was premed and I went on a study abroad program to Mexico to work in a hospital. I am not a doctor now. (It wasn't a total waste, I met Guapo on the trip and learned I didn't want to spend the rest of my life in a hospital.) Every time I wear it I feel like I have to explain WHY I have it and then it brings up all the old unfulfilled dreams/disappointing my family issues. I just feel kind of like a loser dressed up like what I wanted to be for a while. I'm fine with the not being a doctor-I realized I wanted to go to med school more that I wanted to actually be a doctor-but I just hate having to explain it.

(Like I'm doing right now)

So, I finally decided I will not be a doctor and put myself through it. But, that takes away my Halloween safety net.

Anyway, back to the party. I came up with what I thought was the perfect costume- "Woman without Children"

I would start my transformation in the beauty salon with:

1. A manicure
2. A pedicure
3. Highlights
4. Eyebrow wax and shape
5. My hair styled

In addition to my new groomed look, my costume would include:

1. A dress (instead of the mandatory skirt and top due to constant breastfeeding) that was slobber and spit-up free
2. High heals
3. Make up

I thought it was ingenious.

Guapo didn't like it. He told me I would feel dumb without a "costume". I tried to explain how it was a costume-I never look like "Woman without Children".

He suggested my doctor costume. I explained the baggage that goes with that costume. Then he had several other suggestions which included:

1. A Miner
2. A Pioneer
3. Raggedy-Ann
4. A Woman in Jammies
5. A Farmer (this would require my maternity overalls which I have sworn to never wear again)

This was a work party; I knew the type of women that would be going-beautiful Brazilian woman dressed like Samba dancers or swimsuit models. We are already quite the freaks drinking our Sprites-I don't need to be dressed like a farmer on top of it.

So we compromised. Here we are:


Dracula and Dracula's Girlfriend/Victim (see the blood on my neck???)

Best Halloween costume ever!!!